Groin Shot of the Week Candidates

Daunte Culpepper (396 PaYd, 5 TD) - I think I've seen this once before. Week 1, 5 TD for Culpepper. Oh, but this time he decided to add an extra 150 yards threw the air. Man oh man, in the Red Eye Masters league with 16 starters each week and where 200 is a slightly above average score, Culpepper scored 55.2 points for me. That's nuts. I remember Mike Krueger's "insane" pre-season projection for Culpepper having him over 50 points higher than the number 2 ranked QB, shooting CPep way up the Cheatsheet Compiler rankings. Through 4 games he's already accounted for 33% of his projected passing yards, 44% of projected TD and only 10% of projected turnovers. It isn't easy winning fantasy games from the QB position, but Culpepper is winning games!

Tiki Barber (198 Yd, 1 TD) - Value for money. Or should I say, value for draft pick. Tiki is it. It wouldn't have been hard to suggest a down game for Barber coming off an amazing 182 rushing yard performance against the Packers. Nope. How about 122 on the ground, 76 through the air and another TD. The tally is up to 4-100 yard rushing games, 4-games with a TD, 3-straight games with 23 carries, 0-games with a fumble. Not Tom Coughlin's type of running back was the talk back in preseason. I can't think Tom is too displeased with what he inherited so far.

Reuben Droughns (211 Yd, 1 TD) - Let's see, who were the hot waiver wire pickups last week. Amos Zereoue - decent. Jonathan Wells - useless. Mewelde Moore - good. Did anyone pickup Reuben Droughns? No one did in my so-called "expert" leagues. (Note: I prefer to call them "showcase" leagues, and this is a perfect reason why.) Hey, the one good thing is you can tell the Tatum Bell owner in your league who's been spouting his mouth off about having "the next great Denver RB" to shut the hell up! Ha!

Comments From The Couch

• While the Raiders-Colts game looked like a prime opportunity to reenact the fantasy spectacle that the Packers-Colts put on a few weeks ago, Kerry Collins and Jerry Porter obviously had other ideas. What ever happened to that receiver the Raiders had who scored 9 TD back in 2002? He hasn't been seen since.

• And add another 3 INT for Collins matching last week's total. I'd suggest there might be some kind of color blindness problem here, but it doesn't get much more black and white then playing for the Raiders.

• The shootout of the week turned out to be Vikings-Texans. Every legitimate fantasy player, plus underlings, went to town. (Hey, Dom Davis was coming off injury and he still scored). When overtime hit I'm sure a lot of fantasy owners were thinking the bleeding was never going to stop. It didn't. That wasn't just a samurai sword slicing through your chances at a win this week. That was a Hattori Hanzo sword!

• Larry Fitzgerald scored the first TD of his career Sunday. Too bad it was in a losing cause. I have high hopes for this kid. I know I'm getting older because the word "kid" is being used a lot more in this article when referring to players recently.

• Speaking of getting older, not only did my family celebrate Thanksgiving this weekend but I had a birthday as well. It may have been a holiday and my birthday, but I ended up doing less of what I pine for all week - watching football - than I normally would. Ah family. It's a good thing I love them then otherwise I just might have to strangle them.

• I'm liking this Ben Roethlisberger kid (there I go again) more and more. I think Plaxico Burress likes him too.

• Wouldn't you know the one week Peerless Price finally does something notable (yes, 84 yards is notable for him), it is in a losing cause. Didn't you just get the feeling every time someone said, "the Falcons have never been 5-0", which I must have heard about 10 times between Friday and Sunday, you just knew the wheels were going to fall off?

• Chris Simms the starter? Brian freakin' Griese off the bench?!? Just how bad are the Saints this year? No ifs, ands or buts about it, it is time to bring back the paper bags.

• I missed the Seattle collapse and/or Rams surge. About the only thing I did see was the Mike Martz jig on the sideline, which is about the last thing I needed to see on Sunday.

• The Panthers made more of a game of it against the Broncos then I thought they would, which likely means Denver isn't as good as I've been giving them credit for.

• Have to give mention to Dolphins kick returner Wes Welker in case you missed the Chris Berman note about him on ESPN's Primetime. With Olindo Mare hurt, Welker stepped up and booted the extra point on the TD and a 29-yard FG in the 3rd quarter. These were his first kicks since his junior year at Texas Tech when his one extra point attempt was blocked. Welker became the first player since 1989 to have a kick return and kickoff in the same game. On the kickoff they highlighted, Welker shot down the middle of the field and was in on the tackle. Welker!

• Oh, and the Patriots won making is 19 straight, but they don't seem to care that much, so why should we?

• Sunday night I had to explain to my brother how even though there are only 32 starting QB positions in the NFL, that I can still say a guy who earned one of those rare jobs is awful. I used the "old veteran talent drops off really quickly" reasoning for Mark Brunell. I used the "young kid with cannon arm wowed them before the draft but never really had it" reasoning for Kyle Boller.

• Attention Saints fans: If you have a few extra paper bags kicking around, please ship them to Wisconsin, preferably with the pre-cut eye holes. They aren't used to them up there, but are in dire need.

• You know, I would mention the continued disappointment of players like Kevan Barlow, and Fred Taylor, and Ahman Green, and Torry Holt, and Marvin Harrison, etc., etc. But to be honest, it's getting really old and I'm tired of it.

• The injury to Deshaun Foster and Julian Peterson this week marks the 10th and 11th players I've lost to injury in the Red Eye Masters league. Does losing one-third of your roster by week 5 bode well for the remainder of the year? What doesn't help matters is the worst-to-first waiver system and I've been picking last or near last since after week 1. So the record is good but the team is falling apart. All I can say is, Clinton Portis had better get his ass in gear in a hurry!

• I think I just might buy one of those powder-blue throwback Charger jerseys. LaDainian Tomlinson's name on the back you'd think would be a shoe-in, but maybe I should give a little more consideration to Antonio Gates.

• I'm not even going to mention the Bills debacle this week. Bring on the Dolphins!

And The Winner Is…

Our first two-time winner of the year! Daunte Culpepper!