Each week of games is another day in the classroom for fantasy football
2001. Study and you have a chance at passing the course at the end
of the semester. Fall asleep after closing the local bars and you
will receive an "F". Here is what we learned Week 5...
The Fat Boys Are A Liability
The Ravens lost to the Packers Week 5 because the Packers were smart
enough to use the Ravens' defensive strength against them. The Ravens
are great against the run and most teams run on first down. What
the Packers decided to do, as the day went along, was to throw on
first down. What this did was nullify the Ravens pass rush as they
had Tony Siragusa and Sam Adams on the field when Favre was throwing.
Brett Favre, given a good amount of time, will find open receivers.
The Ravens are not as good against the pass as they are against
the run and rely on the third and long situations. The Packers turned
the game around on them. This strategy may be used league wide but
very few teams have Brett Favre.
Nothing Worse For Fantasy Football Than Worthless
Yards
The fantasy owner that played Charlie Batch was the fool that found
the golden goose. Batch hasn't played very well, the Lions suck,
and they were playing a team -- the Vikings - that were going to
beat them. Still, Batch was in for a day where he was going to throw
plenty of passes because his defense couldn't stop the Vikings.
He had the best day of any quarterback that didn't run for any scores.
Tom Brady did almost as well for the Patriots and on any given week
Jake Plummer, Tim Couch, and Chris Weinke could be sitting in the
same spots. The problem is the day when your Mangled Mollusks run
up against the Pottstown Potholes and the Potholes get a 300-yard,
three-touchdown day from Anthony Wright when the Cowboys lose to
the Eagles 42-21. It stinks to be you.
Bad QBs Make For Bad Football
The reason the Dallas/Washington Monday night game looked so bad
was that the quarterbacks on the field were horrible. Sure Anthony
Wright made some nice runs but keep him in the pocket and he makes
horrible reads. Tony Banks is the worst quarterback in the league.
He could well be the worst quarterback in the history of the NFL.
He could be the worst quarterback in the history of the sport. The
running game for each team was fine. Either could've run the ball
all day long and the score may have been 7-6 but it would be construed
as hard fought and a battle of defenses. Instead, as soon as the
ball was going to go airborne it was the Marx Brothers. Good QBs
can have bad games but bad QBs are what make for bad football.
Ricky Watters Is Done
We said this earlier but Ricky Watters' career is over in Seattle.
There are very few scenarios that place Watters back in a starting
role in Seattle. Maybe only an injury to Alexander would do the
trick, as the Seahawks aren't likely to sign Watters for next season.
If Seattle continues to succeed but Alexander proves to be a liability
- can't block or catch or hold onto the pig - then Watters may get
back into the game but what is the chance of the Seahawks succeeding
without a competent running back. Slim is not slim enough. Obviously,
if Alexander is doing a good job it won't matter whether the Seahawks
are playing well or not. The only hope for Watters' owners is a
trade but trades happen less in the NFL than refunds from hookers.
Randy Moss Is A Disappointment
Moss was a high draft pick in many fantasy leagues but after another
disastrous week the season is one-third gone and Moss isn't any
better than Hines Ward or Curtis Conway. The reason? It could be
any number of things but what it isn't is Daunte Culpepper. Culpepper
is playing well. Moss doesn't seem very interested in playing football
anymore. He seems to lack any fire when playing the game. It could
be the money, it could be he doesn't like to be hit, and it could
be he sees the team as a losing situation and doesn't want to put
in any effort. Whatever it is, he is not the player that he was
a year ago. Now he is nicked and it will be interesting to see if
he wants to come out and play in the most important game of the
year. If he doesn't, it may be time to call Purina.
Giants Could Win It All If They Had A Quarterback
This is not a nasty rant against Kerry Collins but let's be honest
he is not Super Bowl material. Look at the Super Bowl winning QBs.
Okay, get past last year. The 2000 Ravens were one of the best defenses
ever to play and they compare favorably with the Bears who had the
fraud Jim McMahon at QB, no receivers, and Mike Ditka. The Giants
are not as good on defense as the Bears/Ravens to win with defense
and a running game. They must produce offense. They have a solid
offensive line that can run the ball. They have three receivers
that can spread the field. They have a quarterback that isn't good
enough to win the game. Collins has a strong arm but he is wild.
He also isn't very mobile. This team is like the 1994 Chargers that
went to the Super Bowl but didn't have nearly enough to stay with
the 49ers when it counted. The Chargers had a good big back - Natrone
Means --, a good defense, and a long passing game - Tony Martin/Shawn
Jefferson but they had Stan Humphries. Humphries is Collins' older
cousin just add the multiple concussions. The Giants are going to
the playoffs because they are a good team but right now they would
be no better than the third seed in the NFC.
The AFC Is A Mess
There isn't a team beyond the Raiders that looks good enough to
go to the Super Bowl. A quick rundown of the pretenders shows a
mish-mash of missing parts. The Ravens are weak against the pass
and mediocre on offense. If they can tighten up on offense they
can make another run but Terry Allen is not the long-term answer
at running back. The Dolphins can't pass, are limited at running
back as Lamar Smith is a one-beer bar, and let's face it; Dave Wannstedt
is not Knute Rockne. The Colts can't stop a cold on defense. The
Jets are the Colts but with Testaverde and Chrebet instead of Manning
and Harrison. That ain't gonna get it done. The Steelers are limited
on offense with Kordell and Hines Ward as the passing attack. There
hasn't been a sadder duo in our sporting lives since Tonya Harding
and Nancy Kerrigan. The Broncos are short-circuiting on offense
and have defensive problems. If the Jets are the lower class version
of this team, the Colts are the middle class version, and the Broncos
are the upper class version. None can contend. Forget the Seahawks,
Bengals, and Browns, as they aren't serious contenders. The Titans
are a possible freak show. If they can get the running game together
and tighten the pass defense they can make a run because their schedule
is a lot lighter the rest of the season. They aren't serious contenders
but it will make the rest of the season exciting. Right now it looks
like an NFC win but there is plenty of football to be played.
Mark Bond can be found,
most days, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn, eating hot sausage sandwiches
topped with BBQ chips, chili, and coleslaw, slapping back Cuervo
shooters, and rambling on about those warm evenings spent with Janet
Reno. He is not related to James Bond but has the same air of sophistication
of Sean Connery. Mark is currently annoying his workmates at Jackpot
Sports, home of the first daily fantasy baseball game, the Reggie
Jackson Fantasy Baseball Challenge, plus weekly and seasonal Fantasy
Football games.
