Each week we will review the great, odd, poor, and weird happenings
of the past weeks football games. Yeah there will be a little fantasy
football info somewhere. I think.
Little known fact about Tom Coughlin is that his favorite rocker
is the late Frank Zappa. He is often heard muttering, "Watch
out where the huskies go and don't you eat that yellow snow."
We think the Steelers gave up a little early Sunday. Three scores
up and they are leaning back on the sidelines watching Todd Bouman
QB the Vikings. They didn't realize that Randy Moss was chartered
to play the fourth quarter.
Speaking of Moss is there a better example of the modern athlete
than Moss. His "I play when I want to" statement was
shocking only because it was so truthful. If the Vikings could
get rid of him without costing their salary cap, they should do
it and soon. Some players are going to be assets when you are
rebuilding - the Vikings by the way are in full rebuilding phase
- but Moss is not that type of player.
When the game is 21-16 and there is little time left, why go
for it with a fourth and goal pass from the 20 and not kick the
field goal, then an onside kick. It isn't a Dave Campo but Dennis
Green's strategy was definitely skewed.
One of the reasons the Lions and Bears are in different strata
this season is their backward stat. The Bears don't go backward
as often as the Lions. Have we lost ourselves in a haze of double
vodkas? Sure, but what does that have to do with backward stats?
Teams have forward stats and backward stats. The Bears give up
fewer sacks, have more takeaways than giveaways, and commit fewer
penalties than their opponents. The Lions are pitifully bad. When
one of the best - the Jets rule backward stats - meets one of
the worst - Vikings were the worst going into Week 12 - it is
likely that the best will best the worst. And they do. The Bears
went backwards six times and the Lions 16. In a close game, that
type of stat makes a big difference.
Fourteen of Jim Miller's completions went for 78 yards. The other
three went for 46 yards. Bears go nowhere without a passing game
that can move the ball down field.
We haven't started wearing our hairy feet or put on the pointy
ears but the "Lord of the Rings" previews look good.
If you like that sort of thing.
The 1976 Buccaneers may be getting nervous, as the Lions are
three games away from tying their momentous achievement. They
play three possible playoff teams the next five weeks and the
only holes are the Vikings Week 14 and the Cowboys Week 17. The
Vikings game is a possibility - One of Randy's off-days -- but
if it gets to Week 17 they will beat the Cowboys.
With Mike McMahon behind center - Charlie Batch is probably gone
for the year - it will be a wild ride. All of the Lions games
should be banned from TV the rest of the year lest some poor child
watches them and mistakes what he or she sees as football.
Is anyone surprised that the Titans beat the Browns? The Browns
have been winning with mirrors - quick, name something they do
well - and were ready for the big loss.
The Titans are done but they can keep the charade alive by beating
the Vikings Week 13. What a dog of a game. At the beginning of
the year the network suits were really worked up over this game
-use your imagination.
Can't say we didn't tell you but Derrick Mason is going to finish
strong.
Give up all hope for Eddie George. The Browns can't stop the
run and George barely went for more than two yards a carry with
the lead.
Ben Gay has a great name, a great story - if you like knuckleheads
that are always given a chance no matter how many times they cock
it up --, and some real football talent but if he continues his
pace of a fumble every 18.5 touches he will be keeping the pine
warm while James Jackson is running the ball.
For people that hate Notre Dame football it is a sad day. The
firing of Bob Davie means it is possible they will return to prominence.
The biggest mistake the administration did was to let Lou Holtz
get away. So what if he wanted to skip literacy as a requirement,
look what that has done for South Carolina football.
With Tom Coughlin in tow - don't believe the Gruden/Mariucci
rumors, they ain't waiting for the NFL season to end before naming
a coach - literacy will be banned and Notre Dame football will
be back on its way.
We said earlier that the Jets go backward less than any team
in the NFL - by a huge margin - but in a close game it meant a
great deal that the Jets went backward nine times to the Patriots
five.
The Patriots have only one tough game the rest of the schedule
- Miami -- and could be 10-6 if they can beat the Browns, Bills,
and Panthers. What a strange year.
The Falcons recovered an onside kick, which eventually went for
no points. The call was an interesting one and probably an admission
by Dan Reeves that his defense can't stop the Rams and better
not give them the ball. It was a unique kick, as the kicker -Jay
Feely - didn't attempt the big bounce strategy that is now in
fashion but dribbled the ball along the ground and was the first
man to the ball. He definitely did that on purpose. It was an
interesting strategy.
For the three owners still clinging onto John Kasay, it was a
great day.
We aren't sure what happens in the Saints locker room at halftime
but we think they bring out a different player and strap Aaron
Brooks' uni to him as once again he was much better in the second
half - 16-for-22 with two scores.
I say we have a playoff between Detroit and Carolina the loser
forfeits the rest of the season. The only people that notice are
the fantasy owners of Wesley Walls.
There is only one Heisman Trophy candidate and that is Julius
Peppers. He won't win the damn thing but he is the best player
in college football.
Chris Cole, Matt Dominguez, Kevin Kasper, and Scottie Montgomery
wouldn't make for a good receiving corps on the Rhein Fire.
Some players love the focus of television. We suspect one of
those players is Warren Sapp. Monday night against the Rams he
was a terror. Sunday, without the shine of a national television
audience, Sapp had a single tackle. Thanks for showing up Warren.
We said this back in September "Michael Jordan will average
a little over 20 points a game, play 60 games, the Wizards would
miss the playoffs, and he would retire at the end of the season."
Now all we need is the retirement party.
Speaking of the NBA, can we hold an eight-team tourney in the
East to determine which team will lose to the Lakers for the crown?
We could end the whole shebang by mid-January.
The Ravens have the week off and Terry Allen may be healthy enough
to junk up the Ravens running game again but outside of a fumble
at the goal line, Moe Williams did all that was asked of him in
his start.
Silently Qadry Ismail is having a career year. So what ever happened
to Travis Taylor anyway?
If you are wondering who has won the Charlie Garner/Tyrone Wheatley
battle for running back in Oakland, Garner seems to have taken
the job between the 20's and Zack Crockett will get the ball at
the goal. Wheatley looks to be reminiscing about the days at Michigan.
Isn't the BCS a wonderful thing? We will have a National Championship
game between Miami and who cares. Could be Tennessee, could be
Oregon, or it still could be Nebraska but other than fans of the
universities or alumni who cares. The old system never decided
a National Champion but made for an enjoyable end of the year.
A playoff system would build a natural match between two deserving
teams. All the BCS does is screw up the whole works.
Our math could be incorrect but we have the first half plays
at 17 for Tony Banks and six for Stephen Davis. If you were the
coach of the Redskins, who would handle the ball in your offense?
Even Monty Burns could tell you that the Cowboys were going to
run Emmitt Smith all day. The combination of Smith's whining and
Quincy Carter at quarterback made it a necessity. Problem for
the Redskins was they knew it was coming but couldn't stop the
Cowboys running game.
Speaking of Washington, with their loss this should stop the
Mike Tirico editorial on ESPN radio for Marty Schottenheimer as
Coach of the Year.
Goodbye Denver.
What is Howie Long's relationship with Teri Hatcher in those
idiotic Radio Shack ads?
The pace of the Falcons/Rams game is so fast that Pat Summerall
mixed up left-handed African-American Michael Vick with right-handed
Caucasian Doug Johnson.
He also called Doug Johnson Dave.
The San Diego/Seattle game could've been a great recruiting tool
for Boston College football what with two Boston College QBs -
Matt Hasselbeck and Doug Flutie - starting. After reviewing the
film, BC officials may want it banned in Boston.
When the Cardinals scored with 1:26 left in the game, a show
of hands for all the people that said they had scored too soon.
Be ashamed if you said it because there is no such thing. A team
scores when they can score. You don't wait some period of time
like a half hour after eating before you start swimming.
If you are a fantasy owner of the Raiders passing game, the excitement
generated by Jake Plummer's toss to David Boston was only edged
by the first time in the back seat of your Dad's Rambler.
John Madden's comment equating Michael Vick's college experience
to a kid taking high school Spanish and then trying to go to Spain
was the most astute thing he has said all year.
Why did FOX hold football fans hostage for a third of the Rams/Falcons
game and not switch to the more entertaining Cardinals/Raiders
game? All that did was push people from the television.
Mark Bond can be found,
most days, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn, eating hot sausage sandwiches
topped with BBQ chips, chili, and coleslaw, slapping back Cuervo
shooters, and rambling on about those warm evenings spent with Janet
Reno. He is not related to James Bond but has the same air of sophistication
of Sean Connery. Mark is currently annoying his workmates at Jackpot
Sports, home of the first daily fantasy baseball game, the Reggie
Jackson Fantasy Baseball Challenge, plus weekly and seasonal Fantasy
Football games.
