Each week we will review the great, odd, poor, and weird happenings
of the past weeks football games. Yeah there will be a little fantasy
football info somewhere. I think.
There is nothing better than a seven game playoff series to determine
the champion. Doesn't matter the sport, if the final goes to game
seven every minute is edge of your seat time.
Since we are on the World Series, what was wrong with pulling Randy
Johnson after six innings? The Arizona bullpen can't be so bad as
not to be able to hang onto a 13-run lead.
If you live by Brett Favre, you can die by him as well. And sometimes
a punt returner brings you back to life.
We see "The Family Feud" in Jerry Glanville's future.
How many times do the producers of the CBS pre-game show have to
get the cardiac crash cart ready to resuscitate Jim Nantz? We say
three an hour.
We all have guilty pleasures in life and two of mine are well-played
defensive football and Sterling Sharpe.
If you are a lover of Coen Brothers' movies a quick word of advice
on their new film "The Man Who Wasn't There." It is a
rental. Well shot, good effort by Billy Bob Thornton, but poor editing
makes it a mess. It isn't one of their best.
Is there any worse feeling than having to go into your fantasy football
contest with Chris Chandler as your starter? Is there any more predictable
sight than seeing this note on the ticker "Chris Chandler left
game - ribs?
Football coaches hate to leave games in the feet of field goal kickers.
Why? Kris Brown.
He did get a fortuitous bounce on one play but Tom Brady came back
after pulling a Byung Week 7 against the Broncos. The Falcons were
happy to oblige.
Michael Vick's Week 8 line is one we should get familiar with as
he ran for 50 yards and passed for 56 yards.
Last year was not a fluke Terance Mathis is done.
It could be his offensive line, it could be his ankle but whatever
it is, Lamar Smith's 126 rushing yards on 63 carries the last three
games is not good. And putting all hope on the shoulders of Jay
Fiedler gives you the same pit of the stomach feeling as giving
your teenage son the car keys so he can drive he and his posse to
the Ozz Fest.
People used to think that the world was flat. Silly, huh. They also
thought that Dorsey Levens was going take time from Ahman Green.
Chocolate milk just blew out my nose I'm laughing so hard.
Those that still hold onto the hope that Corey Bradford will become
a great player should toss it into the same dumpster with the idea
that Tom Green is going to be funny.
I know that three of my fantasy football opponents will have started
Steve McNair they either are idiots or had bye week problems. No
one started McNair because he would account for all four Tennessee
touchdowns. No one.
Other than his family, is anyone sad that Tom Coughlin is failing?
Whenever and wherever small-minded dictators fall the rest of the
world is better off.
How bad could Jeff Lewis have been?
Does anyone believe that "Survivor" isn't scripted? "Survivor"
is to reality as is the WWF. The WWF has never had a betting scandal.
Must love Kerry Collins' philanthropy, as all he wants is everyone
to share in the wealth. From the start of the second quarter to
the end of the game, five of the six scores were on Collins passes.
Three went to the Giants and two to the Cowboys.
Stadium seating at movie theaters has to be one of the five greatest
societal improvements in the twentieth century. The other four are
squeeze ketchup, power windows, microwave popcorn, and plastic liquor
bottles.
It is not Sunday, or Thursday or Monday, until Trent Green throws
an interception.
Mike McMahon, Lamont Warren, Reuben Droughns, and Larry Foster,
Matt Millen should be proud that he has a year up on the Houston
Texans in the expansion race.
Someone may make the argument that Matt Hasselbeck is the future
and Trent Dilfer is not going to be with the Seahawks. On the other
hand, they could make the argument that Dilfer isn't any better
than Hasselbeck but we say that the Seahawks were a contending club
with Dilfer and a joke with Hasselbeck. Matt Hasselbeck 1-4, Trent
Dilfer 2-0.
No truth to the rumor that the Washington Redskins are petitioning
the league to let them skip the bye week and play Baltimore and
Tennessee in a three-way game Monday night.
Last week's Super Bowl took it out of the combatants as the Bills
and Chargers both lost, neither showing much life. If the Bills
had shown some life, it would've been one of the few times all season.
This is not what the Redskins expected but Michael Westbrook has
scored three times in his last six catches. Problem is that the
six catches took almost four games.
Ground Hog Day moment of the weekend; Dave Moore scores again.
One bit of advice to CBS about their rolling scoreboards, put a
little football by the team that has the ball. It makes a lot of
difference when watching at the end of the game.
Having a cold during a slate of Sunday games is bad but making it
worse is hearing Kevin Harlan, Craig James, and Beasley Reece rip
the heart out of the Chiefs/Chargers game.
If you were the Falcons, which would you rather have? Michael Vick
and Alge Crumpler or LaDainian Tomlinson and Drew Brees. Five years
from now maybe the answer is different but we bet the Chargers will
be happier than the Falcons short-term.
Looks like Duce Staley jumps ahead of Correll Buckhalter in the
Eagles running back sweepstakes.
That Eagles/Cardinals game must've been a beauty with no scores
in the second half and the two teams combining for 20 punts.
Want to know when the team you are rooting for sucks? When your
team gives the ball four times to Cory Schlesinger in the running
game, that's when you know your team sucks.
It has been said that only Dean smith could stop Michael Jordan
and it looks like only Dick Vermeil could stop Tony Gonzalez.
After sitting out the first seven weeks, Courtney Brown scores in
the first quarter of his season and he had a great game against
the Bears with three sacks.
We still don't understand it but the pace of six defensive touchdowns
a week will continue as six were scored before the Monday night
game.
Here is how the Redskins beat the Seahawks? Take away one 41-yard
running play and they held Shaun Alexander to 19 yards on 12 carries.
Didn't hurt the 'Skins that the Seahawks had Matt Hasselbeck behind
center.
I hate the Diamondbacks. They are a microwaveable team in the middle
of haute cuisine. Anybody else comes over from the AL and I root
for the AL team. The Yankees are the exception. Despite the amazing
run of stupid moves by Bob Brenly, the Yankees were sent to the
shower and millions of Yankee haters could rest easy for the off-season.
I saw three of the dumbest moves at the end of a football game that
I could ever remember. First, the Jets coach Herman Edwards running
out the clock against the Saints goes for it on fourth and one when
he could punt the ball and place the Saints, at best on their own
20, with two minutes to go. It is a move that six-year olds from
Ulan Bator could make correctly. Edwards is a fool and decides to
go for it. They fail. Then with the Saints inside the Jets 10-yard
line, Damian Robinson -- made news earlier for bringing an assault
rifle to a game in October -- tries to rip Aaron Brooks' head off
after he was stopped on a bootleg. This after the play is over,
it isn't inadvertent; it is stupidity at its zenith. But, there
is more. Kyle Turley coming to Brooks' aid starts dragging Robinson
by his helmet, which nullifies Robinson's idiocy. And then to add
insult to injury he takes a Jets helmet, tosses it across the field,
and makes an obscene gesture. Tack on 15 yards. The Jets end up
winning a game they tried very hard to give away and the Saints
lose a game they should've won.
The Hangover's Top-10
St. Louis Rams
Oakland Raiders
Pittsburgh Steelers
Green Bay Packers
Baltimore Ravens
Chicago Bears
San Francisco 49ers
Miami Dolphins
San Diego Chargers
New Orleans Saints.
Mark Bond can be found,
most days, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn, eating hot sausage sandwiches
topped with BBQ chips, chili, and coleslaw, slapping back Cuervo
shooters, and rambling on about those warm evenings spent with Janet
Reno. He is not related to James Bond but has the same air of sophistication
of Sean Connery. Mark is currently annoying his workmates at Jackpot
Sports, home of the first daily fantasy baseball game, the Reggie
Jackson Fantasy Baseball Challenge, plus weekly and seasonal Fantasy
Football games.
