Each week we will review the great, odd, poor, and weird happenings
of the past weeks football games. Yeah there will be a little fantasy
football info somewhere. I think.
Is there a better football player to watch than Brett Favre? Think
about it, if he is on fire there are plenty of big passes squeezed
into impossible spots and if he isn't then he's creating plenty
of opportunities for the opposition. Lot better than watching the
Bears lobbing the ball four yards down the field.
Marshall Faulk, after sitting for three weeks, -- pissed because
he was forced to sit against New Orleans - facing the Panthers at
home is like when the Tasmanian Devil first escapes from the zoo.
Sheer mayhem. Sadly, the Panthers do not have Bugs Bunny at their
disposal.
The Rams getting a big lead has the same feeling as the old Tom
Osborne Nebraska teams with a big lead. Mike Martz isn't putting
the third string in until he has the poll voters in his back pocket.
Even then, they are still throwing the ball.
No truth to the rumor that the NFL is looking to implement a form
of "Mercy Rule" whenever the Panthers get behind by 21
points.
Is there anything funnier then when the television networks put
the heights and weights on the screen of defensive linemen? When
304 pounds came up for Keith Traylor, I was crying. He hasn't been
304 pounds since fifth grade.
Speaking of Traylor, he and, fellow large person, Ted Washington
have been banned from all buffet restaurants in Chicagoland. This
after the local HomeTown Buffet had to quell an uprising of octogenarians
and single moms when Traylor and Washington plowed through three
steam trays of mac n' cheese, mashed potatoes, and baked chicken.
Thanksgiving is a great day. The combination of family, big feast,
and football turns a Thursday into one of the year's best memories.
I wonder if we could move the day off Thursday and make it Friday
as that way family members with weak constitutions or wide-eyed
innocence miss the Lions/Packers game. A bill in the Senate to ban
the game from television is gathering momentum.
Who is running the Bears passing game, Woody Hayes?
I hate spiking the ball to stop the clock. I realize there are moments
when it necessary but the Bears ran the ball for five yards on first
down with less than a minute to go and should've had another play
called. Even a quick sideline route with a minimal chance of completion
is better than giving up a down. Giving up downs at the end of the
game is unforgivable.
Eddie Kennison retires the night before the San Diego game, we swear
we thought he had retired back in 1997.
Cory Schlesinger is to good offensive football as the Yugo is to
good transportation.
Why do visions of Garo Yepremenian appear when we see a Martin Gramatica
pass attempt?
There is something about the thought of a fresh fruit bowl and a
cup of tea for breakfast that turns my stomach. A real pregame meal
is coffee, pancakes, and bacon. That is the type of food will take
you through four quarters of action while the other stuff has you
reaching for the nachos and bean dip midway through the second quarter.
The battle of inept run Ds went to the Jets as the Chiefs allowed
Curtis Martin and Company 165 rushing yards to running backs. The
Jets have done a better job lately and if they get the run D in
order, they could be a tough team down the stretch. Ah, but the
Jets have Vinny Testaverde. No long-term good can come from Vinny
Testaverde leading the charge.
With Kennison retiring may be a trend will begin. We look at Derrick
Alexander as the next to go.
Do you think the Shawn Jefferson entourage was excited about having
Michael Vick and Doug Johnson tossing the oblong to Mr. Money? Johnson
and Vick were 7-for-16 for 55 yards. This is against the Cowboys.
They tossed 55 yards against the Cowboys! Jefferson should beg Chris
Chandler's forgiveness.
Hines Ward/Eric Moulds, Hines Ward/Eric Moulds, Hines Ward/Eric
Moulds. Of course, we go Eric Moulds. We'd have been better off
with Ward.
Don't know what they used to sedate Kyle Turley but I'd like a dose
as well.
Lots of dropped balls for Doug Flutie but a poorly thrown pass deep
in San Diego territory with little time left in the half killed
the Chargers. No reason to call the play and poor execution means
big touchdown for the Broncos. The Chargers look like they are on
life support. At 5-4, can 8-8 be far behind?
Kris Brown can relate to the ebb and flow of NFL life. One week
1-for-5 and the goat, the next week 5-for-6 and the hero, it turns
that quickly. Many fantasy owners got rid of Brown after the bad
effort but he is going to get plenty of attempts. You can't make
field goals if you don't attempt them.
Votes of confidence are as good as the air they are spoken in and
when Travis Minor gets seven carries, Lamar Smith and his owners
better start worrying. Gaining 183 yards in four games on 81 carries
ain't getting it done.
The Colts are a great fantasy team for owners of Harrison, Manning,
and James but if you give up 27 points to Jay Fiedler, you can't
play football well enough to play at the end of the year.
One of the top signs that you can't play defense is allowing a run
by Antowain Smith of over 10 yards. When he scores in a close game
from 40 yards, you suck.
It has not been a great last couple of weeks for Dennis Green. Loses
to Tampa in an embarrassing game then is named in a nine-figure
lawsuit - no, not another paternity suit - and follows it up with
an embarrassing loss to the Eagles. In some states Dennis, you can
do unemployment through the mail.
We want to see some real "Survivor" action. Wouldn't it
show their true survival skills if we set the lions on those "15
minutes of fame" wannabes? Then we will see if they can survive
Africa.
These things can change but today it is Duce Staley, Stacey Mack,
and Tiki Barber as the victors in the running back races.
Tough to call in Minnesota as for the fourth week this season, Daunte
Culpepper was the leading rusher. Chapman was ineffective and Michael
Bennett invisible so we would lean towards practice as a guide.
Of course, if you are leaning on the Vikings running game for assistance
in fantasy football then you are sleeping with the fish.
Hey Randy Moss, the game was four quarters, not the fourth quarter.
It must be tough being David Boston. The team stinks, they don't
draw, and you are the only good player they have. Every ball thrown
your way hangs with the hope that you and you alone can turn it
into a touchdown.
Albert Connell could, or is it should, pull a Kennison.
Mark Bond can be found,
most days, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn, eating hot sausage sandwiches
topped with BBQ chips, chili, and coleslaw, slapping back Cuervo
shooters, and rambling on about those warm evenings spent with Janet
Reno. He is not related to James Bond but has the same air of sophistication
of Sean Connery. Mark is currently annoying his workmates at Jackpot
Sports, home of the first daily fantasy baseball game, the Reggie
Jackson Fantasy Baseball Challenge, plus weekly and seasonal Fantasy
Football games.
